Marry an Armenian: 3 facts and 2 myths

Aleksandra Dementeva The times when Armenians married only Armenian women are long gone: about 30% of Armenians create families with foreigners, and every fourth has a Russian wife. We tell how a joint life is built in mixed marriages, and is it easy for girls from other countries to get along with temperamental and charismatic Armenian husbands.

Fact 1: The husband is the head of the family

Patriarchal traditions are still strong in Armenian families, and therefore the man is the head of the house. His opinion is the only correct one, his decisions are not subject to discussion, and his desires must be fulfilled unquestioningly. At least, this is the impression that should be created by others.

A good wife will not contradict her husband, especially in public, otherwise he will lose the respect of others. So all disputes are resolved at home, without witnesses. ck/oc/ckocvziez808k40g8c4c0og0w.jpg” media=”(max-width: 549px)”>

/ck/oc/ckocvziez808k40g8c4c0og0w.jpg

Fact 2: Housework is the wife's concern

Many Armenians are still convinced that only a man should earn money, and the main purpose of a woman is to be a good mother and housewife, raise children and do household chores. Not all wives like this distribution of roles. “Most of the issues related to maintaining cleanliness in the house and taking care of children mainly fall on the shoulders of a woman. Moreover, this is perceived as the norm, that is, no one will even appreciate your work,” complains Nairi Grace, an American of Armenian descent who moved to the homeland of her ancestors. However, the situation is gradually changing, and if Armenian husbands are not in a hurry to help their wife around the house, then they devote a lot of time and attention to their children. “More and more often I see dads who go out with their children on weekends, take them to clubs, go to parent-teacher meetings, and stay calmly at home with their children,” says Natalya, who has been married to an Armenian for 10 years.

Fact 3: Husbands cheat on their wives

Despite a serious attitude towards marriage and respect for traditional family values, Armenian husbands are not always faithful. The thing is that they do not consider their own betrayal a reason for divorce. “This is not the case in my family, but if we talk about Armenian husbands in general, then the problem of infidelity is relevant. For some reason, among the locals, the betrayal of a husband is not considered something terrible, ”an Armenian woman who grew up in another country shares her observations.

“No one is immune from the fact that the Armenian husband will not go to the left or even peddle. Many argue like this: since he is a man, he is supposed to walk. But if earlier wives often put up with this, now they basically file for divorce right away,” explains Karina from Moscow.

Astghik Khachatryan/2e/4m/2e4m9pn3mfi8kk88o8s0kckkg.jpg

Myth 1: Wife has no voice

On the one hand, the Armenian husband is a king and god for his household, on the other hand, hidden matriarchy flourishes in families: nothing happens in the house without the consent and approval of the wife. Outwardly, laconic and reserved Armenian women are not at all submissive, and it is their opinion that husbands are guided by when making decisions, although they never admit it out loud. In general, family life is organized according to the principle “husband is the head, wife is the neck”: without directly imposing her will on a man, the wife knows how to gradually direct his energy in the right direction. “In many Armenian families, the husband takes on the role of the head of the family, but at the same time remains on an equal footing with his wife,” a resident of Yerevan describes this family model.

• 

  Shaun Dunphy/6n/tu/6ntuipiujakowwk00ckokgk0w.jpg

What else to read on the topic

• Why living in Yerevan is actually not very good. 6 convincing arguments
• What do Armenians think of Russians? 5 facts that will surprise you
• Why beautiful women are absolutely not allowed to visit Armenia: 5 good reasons

Myth 2: Armenians spoil children

Armenians really they love children very much, but they bring up boys and girls in different ways. Armenian fathers adore their daughters, take care of them in every possible way, and in early childhood they allow their “princesses” literally everything.

But the boy must grow up to be a real man, so they treat him much more strictly: they force him to study well, load him with physical work and punish him for misconduct.

Grown up children are treated exactly the opposite. The son can meet girls, take them to the movies and cafes, and the daughter is under vigilant parental control: she has to think about her studies, return home on time – or better not go on dates at all in order to preserve the girl's honor before the wedding.